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<title>Deference vs. Indifference | Siddhartha Golu</title>
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Deference vs. Indifference There used to be a time
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when things used to be simple.
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I’d wake up, rub my eyes, sit up straight, close my eyes,
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And pray that He will continue to guide me
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as He had done the previous day.
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There used to be a time
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lighting up my day with the secret enchantments,">
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Deference vs. Indifference There used to be a time
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when things used to be simple.
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I’d wake up, rub my eyes, sit up straight, close my eyes,
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And pray that He will continue to guide me
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as He had done the previous day.
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There used to be a time
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when I used to love the aroma
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of the stick when it burned,
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lighting up my day with the secret enchantments," />
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Deference vs. Indifference There used to be a time
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I’d wake up, rub my eyes, sit up straight, close my eyes,
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And pray that He will continue to guide me
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as He had done the previous day.
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There used to be a time
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when I used to love the aroma
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<h1 class="post-title entry-hint-parent">
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Deference vs. Indifference
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</h1>
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<div class="post-meta"><span title='2019-03-15 22:27:30 +0530 IST'>🗓 March 15, 2019</span> · 2 min · 🔖 <a href="/tags/poetry"> poetry</a> · <a href="/tags/writing"> writing</a>
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<div class="post-content"><p><a href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/160696242@N07/46619008205/">(See this picture on Flickr)</a></p>
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<hr>
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<h2 id="deference-vs-indifference">Deference vs. Indifference<a hidden class="anchor" aria-hidden="true" href="#deference-vs-indifference">#</a></h2>
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<p>There used to be a time<br>
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||
when things used to be simple.<br>
|
||
I’d wake up, rub my eyes, sit up straight, close my eyes,<br>
|
||
And pray that He will continue to guide me<br>
|
||
as He had done the previous day.<br>
|
||
There used to be a time<br>
|
||
when I used to love the aroma<br>
|
||
of the stick when it burned,<br>
|
||
lighting up my day with the secret enchantments,<br>
|
||
as if the secrecy itself was the source of my happiness.</p>
|
||
<p>There used to be a time<br>
|
||
when coming home after a bad day,<br>
|
||
I’d sit on my bed and join my hands and close my eyes<br>
|
||
and quietly shed a tear.<br>
|
||
The statues didn’t move or speak or whisper,<br>
|
||
but I felt assured that somehow those little stones<br>
|
||
were the only ones who listened to me<br>
|
||
and answered back.</p>
|
||
<p>But now,<br>
|
||
I wake up and lie on my bed for hours,<br>
|
||
watching the fan complete circles after circles after circles,<br>
|
||
as if I was stuck in the middle while everyone else around me<br>
|
||
kept going through life as if it was such an easy task.<br>
|
||
But now,<br>
|
||
The smell of the burning stick nauseates my senses,<br>
|
||
the secret spells make me mad,<br>
|
||
the constant enchantings feel as if someone lit a person on fire<br>
|
||
while they were sleeping.<br>
|
||
But now,<br>
|
||
when I come back home after a bad day,<br>
|
||
to the empty apartment echoing with silence so loud<br>
|
||
I worry my neighbors will start complaining -<br>
|
||
Even crying for hours doesn’t help.</p>
|
||
<p>Sometimes I think,<br>
|
||
what use is consciousness<br>
|
||
if it doesn’t make you happy but slowly takes away<br>
|
||
whatever little sanity you had left<br>
|
||
second by second.<br>
|
||
Sometimes I worry,<br>
|
||
Did I make a mistake in choosing not to follow blindly?<br>
|
||
Does asking questions that nobody has answers to<br>
|
||
makes me more alive<br>
|
||
or merely leaves me more broken and naive and stupid?<br>
|
||
Is ignorance really bliss?</p>
|
||
<p>I still go to churches and mosques and temples,<br>
|
||
the difference being it was deference before,<br>
|
||
and now it’s curiosity about the people who go there<br>
|
||
and indifference to the thing they pray to.</p>
|
||
<p>Sometimes I wonder,<br>
|
||
There really is no answer, is there?</p>
|
||
<hr>
|
||
<p>A poem I wrote when I had troubles accepting myself. Still do, to be honest.</p>
|
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<section class="webring">
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<h3 class="header">Articles from blogs I follow around the net</h3>
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<section class="articles">
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<div class="article">
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<h4 class="title">
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<a href="https://jvns.ca/blog/2024/01/05/do-we-think-of-git-commits-as-diffs--snapshots--or-histories/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Do we think of git commits as diffs, snapshots, and/or histories?</a>
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</h4>
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<p class="summary">Hello! I’ve been extremely slowly trying to figure how to explain every core
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concept in Git (commits! branches! remotes! the staging area!) and commits have
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been surprisingly tricky.
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Understanding how git commits are implemented feels pretty straightforward …</p>
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<small class="source">
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via <a href="http://jvns.ca">Julia Evans</a>
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</small>
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<small class="date">January 5, 2024</small>
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</div>
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<div class="article">
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<h4 class="title">
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<a href="http://blog.miguelgrinberg.com/post/how-to-add-dark-mode-support-to-your-website" target="_blank" rel="noopener">How To Add Dark Mode Support To Your Website</a>
|
||
</h4>
|
||
<p class="summary">You may have noticed that I have recently added a dark mode to this blog. The default color theme now follows the theme setting in your operating system by default, and you can also select which mode to enable from the top navigation bar.
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||
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||
Nice, right? I ha…</p>
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<small class="source">
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via <a href="http://blog.miguelgrinberg.com/feed">http://blog.miguelgrinberg.com/feed</a>
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</small>
|
||
<small class="date">January 1, 2024</small>
|
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</div>
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<div class="article">
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<h4 class="title">
|
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<a href="https://jlcollinsnh.com/2023/11/29/41-intriguing-quotes-about-family-endgame-the-little-girl-who-wouldnt-listen-from-pathfinders/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">41 Intriguing Quotes about Family, Endgame & The Little Girl Who Wouldn’t Listen from Pathfinders</a>
|
||
</h4>
|
||
<p class="summary">This is the third and final post of “intriguing quotes” since the October 31st launch of… Pathfinders It has been two years in the making and it is a book I have wanted to bring to you since 2016 after The Simple Path to Wealth was published. Within month…</p>
|
||
<small class="source">
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via <a href="https://jlcollinsnh.com/">JLCollinsnh</a>
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</small>
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<small class="date">November 29, 2023</small>
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|
||
.webring .title {
|
||
margin: 4px 0 12px;
|
||
}
|
||
.webring .article {
|
||
flex: 1 1 0;
|
||
display: flex;
|
||
flex-direction: column;
|
||
margin: 0.5rem;
|
||
padding: 0.5rem;
|
||
background: var(--openring-bg);
|
||
min-width: 10rem;
|
||
}
|
||
.webring .summary {
|
||
font-size: 0.8rem;
|
||
flex: 1 1 0;
|
||
}
|
||
.webring .attribution {
|
||
text-align: right;
|
||
font-size: 0.8rem;
|
||
color: #555;
|
||
}
|
||
</style>
|
||
|
||
|
||
</article>
|
||
</main>
|
||
|
||
<footer class="footer">
|
||
<span>© 2024 <a href="https://www.siddharthagolu.com/">Siddhartha Golu</a></span>
|
||
<span>
|
||
Powered by
|
||
<a href="https://gohugo.io/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Hugo</a> &
|
||
<a href="https://github.com/adityatelange/hugo-PaperMod/" rel="noopener" target="_blank">PaperMod</a>
|
||
</span>
|
||
</footer>
|
||
<a href="#top" aria-label="go to top" title="Go to Top (Alt + G)" class="top-link" id="top-link" accesskey="g">
|
||
<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 12 6" fill="currentColor">
|
||
<path d="M12 6H0l6-6z" />
|
||
</svg>
|
||
</a>
|
||
|
||
<script>
|
||
let menu = document.getElementById('menu')
|
||
if (menu) {
|
||
menu.scrollLeft = localStorage.getItem("menu-scroll-position");
|
||
menu.onscroll = function () {
|
||
localStorage.setItem("menu-scroll-position", menu.scrollLeft);
|
||
}
|
||
}
|
||
|
||
document.querySelectorAll('a[href^="#"]').forEach(anchor => {
|
||
anchor.addEventListener("click", function (e) {
|
||
e.preventDefault();
|
||
var id = this.getAttribute("href").substr(1);
|
||
if (!window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches) {
|
||
document.querySelector(`[id='${decodeURIComponent(id)}']`).scrollIntoView({
|
||
behavior: "smooth"
|
||
});
|
||
} else {
|
||
document.querySelector(`[id='${decodeURIComponent(id)}']`).scrollIntoView();
|
||
}
|
||
if (id === "top") {
|
||
history.replaceState(null, null, " ");
|
||
} else {
|
||
history.pushState(null, null, `#${id}`);
|
||
}
|
||
});
|
||
});
|
||
|
||
</script>
|
||
<script>
|
||
var mybutton = document.getElementById("top-link");
|
||
window.onscroll = function () {
|
||
if (document.body.scrollTop > 800 || document.documentElement.scrollTop > 800) {
|
||
mybutton.style.visibility = "visible";
|
||
mybutton.style.opacity = "1";
|
||
} else {
|
||
mybutton.style.visibility = "hidden";
|
||
mybutton.style.opacity = "0";
|
||
}
|
||
};
|
||
|
||
</script>
|
||
<script>
|
||
document.getElementById("theme-toggle").addEventListener("click", () => {
|
||
if (document.body.className.includes("dark")) {
|
||
document.body.classList.remove('dark');
|
||
localStorage.setItem("pref-theme", 'light');
|
||
} else {
|
||
document.body.classList.add('dark');
|
||
localStorage.setItem("pref-theme", 'dark');
|
||
}
|
||
})
|
||
|
||
</script>
|
||
<script>
|
||
document.querySelectorAll('pre > code').forEach((codeblock) => {
|
||
const container = codeblock.parentNode.parentNode;
|
||
|
||
const copybutton = document.createElement('button');
|
||
copybutton.classList.add('copy-code');
|
||
copybutton.innerHTML = 'copy';
|
||
|
||
function copyingDone() {
|
||
copybutton.innerHTML = 'copied!';
|
||
setTimeout(() => {
|
||
copybutton.innerHTML = 'copy';
|
||
}, 2000);
|
||
}
|
||
|
||
copybutton.addEventListener('click', (cb) => {
|
||
if ('clipboard' in navigator) {
|
||
navigator.clipboard.writeText(codeblock.textContent);
|
||
copyingDone();
|
||
return;
|
||
}
|
||
|
||
const range = document.createRange();
|
||
range.selectNodeContents(codeblock);
|
||
const selection = window.getSelection();
|
||
selection.removeAllRanges();
|
||
selection.addRange(range);
|
||
try {
|
||
document.execCommand('copy');
|
||
copyingDone();
|
||
} catch (e) { };
|
||
selection.removeRange(range);
|
||
});
|
||
|
||
if (container.classList.contains("highlight")) {
|
||
container.appendChild(copybutton);
|
||
} else if (container.parentNode.firstChild == container) {
|
||
|
||
} else if (codeblock.parentNode.parentNode.parentNode.parentNode.parentNode.nodeName == "TABLE") {
|
||
|
||
codeblock.parentNode.parentNode.parentNode.parentNode.parentNode.appendChild(copybutton);
|
||
} else {
|
||
|
||
codeblock.parentNode.appendChild(copybutton);
|
||
}
|
||
});
|
||
</script>
|
||
</body>
|
||
|
||
</html>
|